


Pidge's Battle

by Sillygurl1021



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Happy Ending, Blood and Injury, Depression, F/M, Guilt, Loved Ones are Always There, Near Death, Regret, Suicide Attempt, Things Get Better With Time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2020-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:14:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27966653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sillygurl1021/pseuds/Sillygurl1021
Summary: It's a day like any other for the Garrison Trio as they enjoy one of Hunks new deserts but then it changes them in a instant once they over-hear Shiro and Allura talk about something in secret. This conversation involved Pidge's family, making her think too much but at the same time, not enough. She became very irrational and emotional as her two best friends tried to back her up through it all. This includes a mission that led Pidge to realize and discover many things within herself.
Relationships: Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt
Comments: 4
Kudos: 7
Collections: Pidge Angst Bang





	Pidge's Battle

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired for a Pidge Angst Bang that was amazingly fun to do!  
> The beautiful artwork was by Extrasensorious-Zoroark on Tumblr!  
> [Link to artwork](https://extrasensorious-zoroark.tumblr.com/post/637312658782191616/my-art-thats-paired-with-pidges-battle-written)  
> The awesome Ink-beneath-her-fingernails was my Beta, which helped immensely!  
> I hope you all enjoy it!  
> Leave me some love with your thoughts please!

“Hunk, these peanut butter cookies came out amazing!” Pidge praised as she scarfed down another whole cookie. 

“No kidding! These are almost as good as mi mama's garlic knots!” Lance stole a couple more from Hunk’s plate of cookies before he pulled them away from the two.

“Guys! Stop swarming them! I wanted the rest of the gang to try some as well.” He held them down again as he got a scent of his baking. Pidge and Lance just gave each other a look and smiled from that glint of excitement and ambition that came out of Hunk whenever it came to food. 

Lance swung his arm around Hunk’s neck while holding up his last cookie, “You know you’re the man Hunk! You outdid yourself with these.” 

Pidge was chuckling as Hunk started to blush a bit at the continued praise.

“I don’t know if we should mention this one to the rest of them, Allura,” the three heard a voice at a distance but it wasn’t clear enough to hear. “If I know my team—”

“Shiro, as cautious as you are, I believe they deserve to know this. Especially—” Once again, it was cut off. 

“If we just quickly investigate for the safety of the planet and ourselves, then it shouldn’t be a problem,” Coran finished, leaving Shiro to think the situation through. The trio outside the main room looked at each other, ready to go in until they saw Keith pass by them in an instant.

“So, what's this mission that you want to keep from us, Shiro?” Keith stopped steps behind him, crossing his arms. Pidge, Lance, and Hunk decided to follow behind him since he made the first move. Shiro was caught off guard with his team suddenly standing before him, and he sighed. 

“I thought we didn’t hide anything from each other no matter what,” Lance added. Pidge took a step forward.

“Whether the mission is big or small, we all put some sort of effort into it that pulls us through.”

“If it's something personal to one of us then it's even more of a reason for us to go for it, don’t you think, Shiro?” Hunk concluded and then remembered his cookies. “Oh, do you guys want to try my new peanut butter cookies? They are sublime!” He did a chef's kiss gesture right after that. Coran snuck right in front of Shiro and Allura to get one and back to where he was. Allura sighed in exasperation. 

“Shiro?” She called his name for confirmation. He put his hands on his hips. 

“Okay team. You’ve got me on this one but we need to _all_ agree to be calm about this.” He eyed all of them, but Pidge felt like the finger was pointed at her for some reason. They all nodded in agreement. Shiro looked towards Allura and she went to the castle’s main computer. A picture had popped up of a Galra ship that crashed into what looked like some kind of temple. Shiro looked at the image and then back at his team.

“We got a message from the planet Lai that a Galran ship had crashed not too long ago. They went to investigate themselves to be sure no Galra were alive to cause damage to their planet, but they found something a bit more concerning for them than they had expected.” 

“So there _weren’t_ any Galra alive?” Keith wanted to confirm.

“As of now numbah 4, no, but anything could have happened. They might have escaped and hid before a search team was formed to investigate.” Coran then pressed another button on the castle and another picture was shown. 

Pidge’s eyes opened wide and felt her heart race a moment. Everyone looked at Pidge, knowing what was going to come next. “Now Pidge—”

“I’m going,” she made clear. 

Shiro walked towards her. “Pidge, we need to talk about this first and know what—” He was going to lay a hand on her shoulder, but she slapped it away before he could. 

“I can’t believe you wanted to hide this from me Shiro!” She took a step back. “ _You_! Out of everyone here should know what finding my brother means to me!” She felt tears wanting to run down her cheeks but stopped them from doing so. Shiro let out a sigh.

“Yes. You’re right Pidge.” He put his hand behind his neck, trying to figure out how to handle the current situation he’d put himself in. 

“I’ll go with her as back up,” Lance spoke up. He put a hand behind her back to calm her down a bit. To his luck, it was working and he was able to visibly see the tension in Pidge lessen a bit. Hunk then raised a hand. 

“If what we’re going to do is get some intel from that ship, then it’s better to have two computer freaks on it to get in and out easier.” Pidge looked up at Hunk with reassuring eyes as he gave her a wink. She was feeling a bit better about the situation. Shiro felt grateful for the two being there for her and calming her down. He dug himself a hole when he knew what he should have done, but this still left him concerned for what may happen. 

“I think Pidge has enough with Lance and Hunk. By the looks of those pictures, there are a good amount of bodies on those floors for it to be that whole ship, so their chances of coming across any Galra are slim. I'll stay up here ready to board Red in case of anything,” Keith added. Shiro had to admit that he was right, but he was still hesitant. He pinched the center of his brows and sighed. 

“Alright. We will go with that.” Pidge was ready for whatever information she may get about Matt and even the possibility of finding him. “You three are still to come here when we call for whatever reason! I still want to look into this a little more before we arrive.” He turned to look behind him. “Coran, how long till we get there?” 

Coran then started doing his thing on the computer. “About one quintant.” 

“Great! That gives me time to work on some things to use on this mission!” Pidge exclaimed with glee. 

“That’s fine Pidge, but remember what I told you three. Be ready in case of anything.” By the time Shiro finished, Pidge had already sprinted to her room. Lance and Hunk nodded towards Shiro as they looked back at Pidge, disappearing in the distance. They gave each other a look of concern from how sensitive this subject is along with Pidge’s temper.

* * *

Only a few hours were left until their arrival to planet Lai, and everyone was doing their own thing. Keith was preparing himself with Red as was Allura, resting and preparing herself in case they had to leave in an instant with her time warp. 

Coran and Shiro were looking through the few images the people of planet Lai sent them. Keith was right, there were quite a few bodies on the floor, but it left Shiro worried if the Galra weren't the only ones left for dead.

Hunk was helping Pidge get her things together since she was trying to complete a flash drive that would access the Galran computers like Shiro's Galra-tech arm. It's something she'd been working on for a while, she just needed to fix a few kinks on it, and it was even faster with Hunk’s help. 

Lance was preparing all their things for the mission since Hunk was assisting Pidge. That was fine with him as long as he was of some help, but he couldn’t help but get this nagging feeling that they should stay away from the planet. Of course, he couldn’t tell Pidge that, but once he was done doing what he needed, he decided to go see if Shiro had found anything.

“Hey. Anything on those pictures? Or maybe extra info?” Lance had his hands in his pockets as he nonchalantly stood beside Shiro. Coran had left to check on Allura and the castle system. 

“No. Nothing out of the ordinary.” He continued scanning the images. “It’s clear as day that there are many dead soldiers on the floor, but what worries me is if there were hostages in there. Meaning they may more than likely be in the same condition as these soldiers.” Shiro glanced at Lance. The Blue Paladin knew what he meant and looked at him.

“I’ll stay ahead to... to make sure she doesn’t see anything like that...” He was hesitant, but it's something he had to do, because he knew this would destroy Pidge. Shiro nodded.

“My only other concern is that the planet itself is rather strange.” He showed Lance some text he had found. “It says here that the planet hasn’t been populated for many years... but then again, who knows how accurate the castle’s information is?” He shrugged.

“Did you guys actually see the civilians, or only receive a message?” 

“We received a video message. I guess that’s proof enough.” Shiro then played said clip. Lance was eyeing the message with the same uncertainty he'd been feeling.

His intuition is usually very accurate. This one time, he is hoping that it is completely wrong.

* * *

“We’ve arrived, Paladins,” Coran stated. “You three go on ahead with your mission. The castle will be here in case anything dangerous comes our way.”

Shiro, Coran, Allura, and Keith were in front of the castle computer looking at Pidge, Lance, and Hunk as they nodded on their separate screens.

“We will be back in no time guys!” Lance said with a smile.

“Yeah, and don’t forget to eat those cookies, because I know once we get back, Lance and Pidge are going to attack whatever is left,” Hunk chuckled.

“Don't blame us for your amazing cooking Hunk!” Lance followed.

“Guys, let’s go already.” Pidge flew ahead on Green. 

“Be safe, Paladins,” Allura said aloud before their screens logged out. 

_Pidge, please evaluate your options wisely and do not let your emotions get the better of you._ A voice spoke to her. 

“Green, I’m not going to let the possibility of getting my brother back slip between my fingers,” she responded. She could feel Green’s worry. Pidge composed herself and relaxed. “I know, Green. We will go in and out as quickly as possible. It will be fine, girl.” She smiled, but still sensed the lion's anxiousness mixed with worry. 

Lance and Hunk followed Pidge towards the ruined temple that they were directed to, but once they landed they didn’t see a ship.

As the three stepped out of their lions, asked the obvious question. “Ummm... Is it just me, or is that temple missing a busted ship in the middle of it?” Pidge lifted her arm and started pressing buttons on a small computer watch she had made. 

“Guys... isn't it really creepy looking around here?” Hunk was shaking as he held his Bayard. Lance and Hunk were aimlessly looking around as Pidge kept quiet until—

_Ping._ The smallest sound came out of Pidge’s device, but it made the guys jump out of their suits.

“Okay so the actual crashed temple is only a walk from here. It seems that the fog was so thick that we weren't able to notice it.” She looked up and saw Hunk holding Lance in his arms, bridal style. “Ummm... Are you two good?” Lance quickly got off of Hunk as they both cleared their throats. 

“So, which way?” Hunk asked. Pidge pointed and they started their trek. As they made their way towards the abandoned temple, Pidge’s eyes were glued on her device to stay on track since the fog wouldn’t seem to break. Lance took the opportunity to sneak beside Hunk and talk to him.

He whispered, “Hey, buddy. Don’t mention anything to Pidge yet, but Shiro has a bad hunch that there might not just be Galra soldiers left on that broken-down ship.”

Hunk raised a brow. “What do you mean?”

Lance put his hand on one side on his mouth. “He’s afraid that the hostages may have been left, too... You know...” Hunk then covered his mouth.

“ _No_... That would... That wouldn’t be good at all...” Lance nodded and turned to look ahead of him. “So, we need to be there for Pidge just in case of that. Maybe even be one step ahead of her, just in case—”

“Just in case what?” Pidge interjected as she stopped and turned. Both Lance and Hunk looked like a pair of deer in front of headlights. “You two were keeping your distance and it seemed weird to me, so I listened in a bit.” She crossed her arms. “What is so bad that you two say you need to be there for me instead of actually telling me? I'm tired of all these secrets!” She was infuriated. The two eyed each other. 

“Okay Pidge... Okay... look... Ummm...” Lance was trying to find the right words to tell her, but couldn’t find any. 

“Pidge, Shiro was looking through those images we saw once we were told about this whole thing, and after looking through them the whole way here he’s worried that... that there might have also been hostages on that ship...” 

“That would be the best-case scenario! I _want_ to find my brother!” She said loudly, frustrated.

“No... Pidge, you’re not understanding... Hunk said might have been... As in—” She then realized.

“No, there's no way.” She looked down, a bit defeated. “That wouldn’t make sense. I’ve been trying to find him this whole time and...” She looked like she was about to snap, but felt a gentle touch on her shoulder.

“Pidge, we’re here for you. We will search and make sure your brother isn't on that ship in that kind of condition,” Hunk gently smiled, but spoke with a serious tone. “I'm sure he's alive and well.” She felt her eyes start to sting from holding back tears.

“Let's go and get this started so you can continue your search on your brother Pidge!” Lance gave her some encouraging words, but it all seemed for naught. She knew that the possibility of what they said was very likely, and the fact that she didn’t consider it made her realize how blind to the situation she may be. 

Without a word, she turned and made her way towards their destination. “Pidge...” Lance tried to reach out, but Hunk stopped him.

“Just let this sink in for her, Lance. At least she knows now in case of anything.” Lance kept his eyes on Pidge, full of worry and that nagging feeling that things aren't going to get better. All he could do is take a deep breath, swallow those feelings and continue on for her sake. 

As they made their way, Pidge kept thinking and thinking. _What if my brother is... I don’t know if I can handle that... No. Of course, I can't!_ She felt tears rolling down her cheeks, but wiped them away before Lance and Hunk could notice. _Hunk and... Lance..._ She glanced back for a moment only to see them looking around, making sure nothing jumped out at them. 

She looked ahead once again. _They... They kept this from me... How could they?_ Then she stopped in her tracks for a moment. _No!_ She yelled inside her head. _Those two have always been there for me! Even though this is about my brother... Hunk and Lance know how much this all means to me._

“Ummm, Pidge?” Hunk called out her name since she was just standing there, looking aimlessly at nothing. “Did you see something?” Pidge regained her composure and shook her head. 

“I thought I did, but it was just my imagination.” She kept moving forward. She felt so emotional and she hated it. _Maybe if I just concentrate on keeping an eye on our surroundings... I’ll calm down._ She then did so, and not a moment passed for them to finally reach the temple.

“That didn’t take long at all.” Hunk expected it to take longer, looking around the ruined temple. 

“This place looks worse than the one we landed next to.” Lance eyed Pidge.

“At least it’s intact, but it _is_ very old.” She looked around. Lance was glad that she didn’t seem too fazed, but he could still tell in her expression that she wasn’t fully herself. He glanced at Hunk and he gave Lance a nod. He knew what he was thinking, and they mentally prepare themselves in case the worst comes. 

“And don’t forget to mention super creepy...” Hunk added, “But... it's not like we haven't seen creepier.” He grinned, looking at his friends.

"Yeah. We’ve been through a lot so far.” Pidge listened to them, and reminisced a bit. _They're right. If we’ve gone through hell and back..._ She let out the slightest smile.

“We have, haven't we?” She looked up at them and felt blessed to have the two dorks before her. “Now, let's go in before something comes to attack us.” She continued on. Lance and Hunk gave each other a smile of slight relief as they followed. 

Pidge was unintentionally moving at a rather fast pace. Hopping over rocks and debris on the floor as she tried to reach the ship. “Pidge! Slow down!” Hunk tried to call out to her, but it seemed like she was blocking everything out. Not because she meant to ignore him, but because that desire to find her brother was so engraved in the back of her mind that even if she _wasn’t_ trying to think about it, her body moved on its own. 

“Pidge—” Lance tried to call out to her as she climbed a pile of rocks leading to a hole on the ship.

“Over here, you guys!” She then contacted Shiro. “Shiro, we finally found an entrance to the ship. How is everything up there?” She waited for a response before she entered the ship but without a second thought, she continued on. 

“Shiro?” Lance called out, but got no response. 

“I’m sure the communication is a bit off with all the debris and fog,” Pidge dismissed the situation and continued on. Lance and Hunk barely made it to the entrance Pidge had found and dashed after her together.

“Buddy... I don’t have a good feeling about any of this.” Lance had to finally give in to the feeling and just be prepared for anything. Hunk nodded with a gulp.

“Yeah. Me too...” Hunk inspected every area that they passed as they finally reached Pidge at the main computer on the Galra ship, but to all of their dismay, it was a complete wreck. 

“Pidge...” Hunk said quietly. The main computer on the ship was nonexistent. It looked like it was blasted intentionally, but they would never know for sure.

She had her hand on her left arm and just stood there for a moment. She took a deep breath and turned around to face the two. 

“Welp. That sucks.” She put her hand on her helmet and turned towards the two. “Would you two mind if we inspect the place a little before we leave?” Hunk and Lance had noticed in an instant that Pidge was trying to hold back tears. Even if they were in a rush, they couldn't say no to her so they nodded.

“Why would we say no?” Hunk gently smiled. Pidge smiled in return. Lance did as well, but he couldn’t help but feel the need for them to leave instantly. 

A few moments passed, but they found nothing. Pidge felt slight relief to know that her brother wasn't anywhere to be found, but as they all thought this same thing, Lance mentioned something critical. “Hunk... Pidge... What... What happened to all the bodies we saw in those images?” 

The three looked at each other with fear in their eyes that they instantly gathered together. “Let’s leave. _Now_!” Pidge practically ordered as they all ran towards the exit. 

“Shiro! Can you hear us!? Something is wrong! Answer us, _please_!” Hunk called out with haste in his tone, panting.

“Damnit! What is happening!?” Lance felt furious and terrified at the same time. Pidge was just biting her lip as they ran, hoping they’d all make it out of whatever situation they were in. 

They reached the exit and took it slow. One of them glanced out to make sure nothing was around. There was nothing, so they continued on as they left the ship. 

Just then, there was static from Shiro's end. “Att—” Was all they heard.

They stopped in their tracks. 

“What? Shiro!” Lance yelled out.

“Sup... ack...” They looked at each other in confusion and worry. 

“Paladins! It’s an ambush! Retreat!” Coran managed to contact them through a separate communication. The color drained from their faces. 

They were reaching the exit to the ruins, but were surprised by many Galra soldiers. 

“No!” Hunk yelled out, jumping in front of Lance and Pidge. His Bayard switched to his launcher, shooting whatever came their way. “Go over there! I’ll join you in a bit!” Hunk yelled out, but at that moment, he got shot on his shoulder.

“Hun—” Lance readied himself ting able to change coo help.

“Lance, cover me!” The Yellow Paladin yelled as he dismissed the pain on his shoulder. Hesitant, Lance and Pidge rushed to a spot behind a few boulders.

“I got you, buddy!” The blue Bayard then switched to his rifle. “Anything on the castle, Pidge?” In the meantime, Pidge was trying to contact the others, but it looked like they were being attacked from up there as well. 

“No. They were ambushed too. I think Shiro and Keith are fighting them off.” She felt guilty for her selfish ways. _All because of me. This is all happening because I'm so narrow-minded!_ She was so mad. She looked at Lance as he was shooting with his sniper rifle and Hunk, who was trying to get closer to them as he shot a majority of the soldiers. 

Her Bayard switched to her grappling hook as she stood up. Lance glanced at her and stopped her in time before she ran towards the soldiers. He pushed her just behind Hunk as the shooting stopped.

“ _WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING_?!” 

“I don’t know! _Something_! Anything, as long as I'm not the one being protected when I'm the one who caused all this!” She yelled, tears starting to trickle down her cheeks.

Lance hovered over her. He felt her pain. He was so scared that the bad feeling he'd been having was because they were going to lose someone. 

“Guys...” Hunk turned to look at them. They both got up and noticed the Galra had stopped shooting. “What should we do?” They all looked at one another. Just then, they heard an extremely loud blast. 

“No...” Pidge looked up and sure enough, the Galra were hitting the temple, trying to crush them.

“ _RUN_!” Hunk yelled, all three running, their lives depending on it but at the same time, doing so while dodging shots from the soldiers as best as they could. They almost made it outside to him, but one last shot from above brought down the whole entrance of the ruins. 

Pidge couldn’t believe it. Hunk looked back at his two friends and fear showed within his eyes as tears ran down his cheeks before he was shot—once in his chest and again in his leg.

“ _HUNK_!” Was all Pidge could yell out as rocks began to fall on top of Hunk.

Just then, she felt herself be pushed to the floor. Lance once again hovered over her as big rocks started falling on top of them. Lance made it seem like he was fine, but he was struggling so much to hold himself up. 

“Sorry, Pidge…” He managed to say with pain in his voice. She then saw blood streaming down from his head. 

“Lance…” She was then bursting in tears. Her two best friends were literally _risking their lives_ for her. “Why would you apologize?” She asked with a shaky tone. Lance’s vision started to get blurry and his body began to shake. “ _Lance_!” She held his face, trying to make sure he didn't pass out. 

“I… you…” he managed to push the rocks around them to the side and fell slightly to her side. Pidge felt numb. 

“L-Lance… wake up…” She knew she had to get up. She was bleeding and limping as she pushed debris to the side, Lance’s arm around her neck. She was dragging him as she made it to Hunk. Laying Lance down and moving the rocks Hunk had on him, she realized this was it. 

_I can’t…_ She thought, tears running down her cheeks. _They… they can’t leave me…_ She was confronted with the sight of her two best friends… near death. She was so overwhelmed with the state of Lance and Hunk that she didn’t realize the Galra were inching closer towards her. 

“Lance. Hunk,” She whispered to herself. She was trying to think what to do.

What could she possibly do? Hunk and Lance were hardly breathing. She was weak and injured. Just then, she heard the footsteps of the soldiers stop, and looked up to find them pointing their guns at her.

She was a goner. They were done for.

She slowly put her head down, emotions overflowing within her in her last moments. She lifted her head up and... 

“ _HELLLPPP_!” She yelled out so loud that she felt like her lungs were going to burst, and just as she did, a loud roar was heard around her. She opened her eyes and saw that Green was protecting her as Blue and Yellow fought the Galra. 

Green’s paws were surrounding her Paladin as she lowered her head to pull Lance and Hunk in.

_Pidge, please hurry! You can do it!_ Green encouraged her to snap out of the sudden trance Pidge was in from being saved.

She felt her tears overflowing and sniffling as she quickly got up as best as she could while dragging the other two inside Green. She didn’t know how she managed to do it. Possibly the adrenaline in the moment, but it didn’t matter. 

With a heavy breath and pain all over her body, Pidge stopped pulling the two only steps within Green and fell back. Green closed her mouth and lifted her head, letting out one last roar as she flew up with Blue and Yellow. 

“Thank you…” She cried out with so much pain in her voice. “Thank you, Green… Thank you…” Was all she could say as she cried and cried, holding the hands of Hunk and Lance. She lifted their hands to her face and was hoping… praying… “Please… please let them stay alive!” 

Green flew as fast as she could. She was able to see the castle at a distance.

Shiro and Keith were fighting off the few Galra ships that were left. “Pidge!” Shiro said with relief in his voice. Blue and Yellow started fighting alongside Shiro and Keith to get Green in the castle first. 

Keith logged into Lance and Hunk’s comms to see how they were, but saw nothing. “What the…” He then noticed Green entered the castle and had a horrible feeling. 

“Okay, Keith! Let’s head in before more come out!” Shiro said and all went in the hanger. 

“Be ready, Paladins! We’re going to jump into another area with no Galra!” Allura warned as they all felt the force of them warping into another area in space. 

Once everything was calm and they were safe, Keith ran out of Red towards Green. “Shiro!” He quickly took his helmet off and tossed it to the side. “Something’s wrong! Hurry!” Green opened her mouth and Keith quickly entered with Shiro behind. 

“Oh no…” Shiro was full of fear. Keith was distraught. The three were on the floor, unconscious, bloody, and barely breathing. Pidge was against the wall holding the hands of the other two on the floor. 

“No… How could we have let this get so bad!” Keith yelled as he went in to get ahold of Lance and Pidge. Shiro carried Hunk as he tried to think things through. 

“Keith… let’s just get them to Coran as fast as possible.”

He pleaded in his head that they weren’t too late. Even if they can be healed in a healing pod, it can only do so much. 

* * *

A few days have passed. The three were still in the healing pods as the rest of the gang waited in fear of them never awakening.

Keith in particular waited for the three the whole time where they would awaken. Shiro, Allura, and Coran had to attend to the castle here and there along with informing other planets to be aware of the Galra. 

Keith was leaning against one of the healing pods when he felt a sudden movement from the one he was against. His eyes opened wide and gasped.

“Pidge!” He yelled out as she weakly stepped out, causing Keith to catch her. 

She put her hand to her head, trying to recall everything. Her eyes opened wide and quickly got her balance back.

“Lance! Hunk!” She yelled out, seeing the two in similar healing pods she just came out of. “They... They’re... okay?” She asked confusedly as she glanced at Keith. He bit his lip and put his hand behind his neck. 

“Pidge... They are going to need a bit more time with their healing...” Keith reluctantly let out, not knowing how she would take it since he wasn’t sure what they had gone through.

Pidge was fixated on the two as a tear started to fall and she slowly went down on her knees.

“Pidge!” Keith fell alongside her, putting his hand on her back. 

Waves of tears began to fall uncontrollably as she bent forward, covering her face. “It’s all my fault... If it wasn’t for me... they would be fine... they wouldn’t have had to cover me!” She cried out.

Keith felt horrible for her... He wanted her to get better. He wanted Lance and Hunk to be out. He couldn’t imagine how she must be feeling. 

“Pidge, They will come out of this just fine, like every time something’s happened. Just you wait.” He started rubbing her back. She calmed down a little. 

“How are you so sure…?” She then laid her hands on her knees. “You weren't there... you didn’t see the horrible condition I had left them in! They were hardly breathing and—”

“I saw.” This caught her by surprise. “I saw the condition the three of you were in along with Shiro and all of us were pleading the three of you made it alive.” He had a serious tone that made Pidge’s tears cease. “All three of you were in horrible conditions. I'm just glad that you are back to us right now.” He looked at the healing pods, as did Pidge. “I know they will come back, too. They just need a bit more time.” 

Pidge let out a small sigh. She was incredibly weak and extremely hungry.

Keith glanced her way and gave a gentle smile. “C’mon. Let's take you to rest. I’ll inform the others and get you something to eat.”

She looked up at him and nodded. She couldn’t bring herself to smile, even the slightest bit.

As they walked out the door, she looked back at Hunk and Lance in their healing pods.

* * *

Weeks passed and nothing changed with Lance and Hunk’s conditions. Coran was able to see that they were doing better, but nothing about when they might come out.

Missions had come and gone where Pidge was too afraid to join the rest, so she gave support from within the castle as she waited beside Lance and Hunk. 

The rest of the team was worried for Pidge. She never left those two’s sides, hardly ate, and never wanted to speak to anyone about that day. The images were just too much for her that it made her feel all the physical and emotional pain of that day. 

One night, she was ready to head to bed as everyone else was asleep. It had been a little over a month, and she couldn’t take it anymore.

“They haven't woken up... what if they never do...” She tried her best to not think of these things but it was inevitable. “At this rate... I'm no use to anyone... I... I can’t do this anymore...” 

She got up and slowly made her way to the hanger where Green was. She leaned her forehead on Green’s paw and cried. “Green... I can’t wait anymore... What if they never come back?” She felt herself break for the millionth time. 

_Pidge. In times like these we need to stay strong and hope for the best._

“Hope!? Hope hasn’t done anything for me! I’ve been hoping... pleading... _praying_ that they’ll wake up, but it's been so long! I... I did all this and I just need to give my own due...” Green was trying to follow, but felt in her heart what she meant. 

_Pidge, that’s not—_ Pidge suddenly blocked her out and went inside Green. 

“I’m leaving.” She sat down on her seat and slowly started wiping tears away from her cheeks. “Leaving to where I belong after what I did.”

Green tried to talk to her, but Pidge completely blocked her out and ignored every method of communication she tried to get to her. She exited the castle and replayed everything in her head, making her sure of what she was going to do. 

A few moments had passed and she was sure the others wouldn’t be able to get to her.

Sitting still for a moment with her hands on the controls, she mentally prepared herself for what she was going to do. She felt dizzy. She felt tired. Her eyes were red, but dark.

She slowly got up and stood beside the door. 

“I deserve this. After everything I did. They aren't coming back after my selfishness and I have to pay for that,” She told herself. At the same time, she was uncontrollably crying without really feeling it and her breathing was getting heavy, but even after all that, she was still determined to jump out of Green and succumb to the beauty of space after all she believed she had done. 

One push and it would all be over.

She gulped and began to count down. 

“One...” She thought back to her friends and family.

“Two...” She thought back to her two best friends who risked their lives for her.

“Three.” 

She pushed the button... and nothing happened.

“What?” She looked around and felt the warmth of Green’s light surround her. In that moment, Green was able to speak to her. 

_Pidge, don’t do this._ She felt even more tears flowing down her cheeks more. _All the people you just thought about are the same people that are going to be there for you and help you heal. With time._

Pidge broke down and fell to her knees.

_Lance and Hunk are fine. I know you feel it, too. They will forgive you and be there for you just as you would be for them. So stay strong, Pidge, and confide in those you love and those who love you._

At that point, Pidge was gasping for air and crying like a newborn baby. The tears just continued as she felt all her pain coming out.

Just then, a beeping was heard from the comms and Green turned them on.

“Pidge!” She stopped and looked at the screen. “Pidge! We’re fine! We’re here!” Hunk yelled with a shaky and weak voice. “Please, tell us you're okay...”

Pidge felt all the pain once again, but this time it was mixed with relief.

The gang heard her crying. 

The pain they all heard from her cries. The anguish. Everyone had tears in their eyes for her and slight relief from knowing everything would slowly get better.

Lance and Hunk knew Pidge best and knew she must have had an excruciating time waiting.

“Katie...” She heard Lance’s voice and got quiet. “We're here for you... and we’re fine, so please... come back.” She couldn’t stop all the emotions she felt and just continued crying.

Lance sighed. “Green, can you please bring her home?” They saw a bright green light flicker as Green started making her way back. 

Once Green had landed inside of the castle, Lance and Hunk dashed as fast as they could towards Pidge and all three fell to the floor crying as their arms wrapped around each other.

Slowly, she made her way towards the others alongside Hunk and Lance. She felt even more ashamed for putting them through something that she herself was struggling so much with. 

“I... I'm so—” She then felt a tight hug from Allura.

“Oh, Pidge... Thank the stars that you are well now!” Tears were streaming down her cheeks. She pulled her back a bit, her hands still on Pidge’s shoulders. “You have absolutely nothing to apologize for.” She laid her hand on the younger girls cheek as she wiped off the tears that had begun falling once again. “I am here for you, and so is everyone else. Expressing one’s worries, whether they be big or small, helps a great deal.” Allura gave the gentlest smile. 

Pidge felt overwhelmed from all the love and support she was receiving from everyone. She couldn’t help but cry nonstop, but she was finally able to give a genuine smile because she knew everything was going to be okay.

Shiro walked to her and gave her a hug, as did Keith and Coran. 

As Hunk, Lance, and Pidge made their way towards the kitchen, she couldn’t help but smile. “You guys... have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” She walked in between both of them and wrapped her arms around both of theirs. 

“I know, Pidge. I’m just glad everything is fine now.” The three stopped and Hunk put his hand over the one that she’d wrapped around his arm. “Thank you for waiting for us... and more importantly,” he looked down at her with tears in his eyes, “being here.”

She smiled at him and felt the warmth she needed to know that things will be fine. She felt as if she needed constant reassurance that everything would be alright. 

“Thank you, Hunk. That... That means a lot.” She squeezed his arm. Hunk nodded and then realized how hungry he was. 

“Man... I'm sorry, you guys, but I'm jogging ahead because my body may be feeling a million times better, but my stomach has hunger pains!” He then made his way down the hall towards the kitchen as Lance and Pidge chuckled. 

Pidge then suddenly felt her heart beat a little faster as Lance’s hand slowly crept to hers. She looked at their hands and then up at him. He was scratching the back of his neck with his other hand, not making eye contact. 

“You know, the moment we got out of those healing pods... I was really worried, Pidge...” He stood, quiet, as his grip got a little tighter. “I was thinking about what I could have done to make things different. Maybe I could have said something before the whole mission... I had this bad feeling the whole time and... just...” He finally looked down at her. “I'm just so relieved that you are fine Pidge because if you were gone... I don’t know...”

Pidge felt her heart squeeze a moment. _He... he was going to say something... before... maybe..._ Her cheeks flushed.

“You... you were going to say something before you fell unconscious... during the mission.” Lance looked surprised. His cheeks turned a shade redder and he let go of her hand. 

“Ummm, well... Uh... Yeah...” 

“Are you two going to grab something to eat or am I going to eat everything in the fridge!?” Hunk yelled. 

“Oh! Ummm... I'll be right there, buddy!” He looked at Pidge once again. “Maybe... Let's grab something to eat and then...” Pidge chuckled, but already knew. 

“Yeah. That’s fine.” Lance smiled and couldn’t help but feel his heart practically break out of his chest. He walked ahead as Pidge stood still for a moment.

Even if it may take some time to get past the emotions she had felt, she knew it would be fine. With the help of those she loves, she is sure she can get through anything now. 

  
  



End file.
